The Church and Kingdom of God

I led the discussion this past Sunday for this chapter in Teaching of the Presidents of the Church: Joseph Fielding Smith.  This chapter is FULL of wonderful information about our church organization.

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From the Life of Joseph Fielding Smith

The thing that impressed me most from this section was that President Smith grew up with an excellent example of righteous living and dedication to God.  His grandfather, whom he never met, was martyred for his testimony of the Gospel.  His father was dedicated to the church and eventually became a prophet.

I really appreciated the story in this section about President Smith's dedication to church service.

A simple and unassuming man, Joseph Fielding Smith never sought these positions. But when the Lord called him to serve, he willingly and enthusiastically obeyed. He quietly exhibited this dedication one day when, at age 89, he went to a meeting. Walking from his home, he slipped and fell down a flight of steps. Although he hurt his leg, he walked about a quarter of a mile—“limping like an old man,” he said—so he could fulfill his responsibilities. After the meeting, he walked back home, where he finally allowed a doctor to examine him. The doctor found that President Smith’s leg was fractured in multiple places. President Smith later commented on the experience. “The meeting got a little long,” he said. “But then, most meetings do.

What a great example!  I sometimes complain that I can't go to meetings when I have a headache or my stomach hurts.  This servant of God went with what I am sure was a very painful broken leg.

I love this sentence:

Through these service opportunities, Joseph Fielding Smith came to appreciate the Church’s inspired organization and its role in leading individuals and families to eternal life. 

Do we allow our service in the church to lead and teach us to appreciate the Church's organization?  Or do we question leadership decisions because we don't understand and agree? Do we allow our service to teach us how the church leads individuals and families to eternal life?  Or do we grumble about the time and energy it takes to complete our church responsibilities?

On to section 1: After centuries of spiritual darkness and apostasy, the Lord has restored His gospel and organized His Church on the earth.

In D&C 1:30, we are told that the church would be brought "forth out of obscurity and out of darkness".

The Lord [has] restored the gospel and organized again his Church upon the earth. The reason for such organization and restoration is the fact that for centuries the world had been in spiritual darkness, without the authority, and without the understanding; they knew not how to worship the living God. …

Without organization comes chaos.  Without authority and understanding there can be no ordinances performed and no progression. 

The everlasting covenant had been broken; the correct understanding of gospel principles had disappeared through apostasy; the right to officiate in the ordinances of the gospel had ceased among men. It became necessary that all this might be restored, and that faith might increase among the people through an opening of the heavens and a restoration of the gospel.

[correct understanding] - during the apostasy, part of the information (knowledge)was on the earth, but it had been corrupted and polluted by the philosophies and teaching of men.  The teachings were not understood correctly and the authority of God to act on that knowledge was not present.

[right to officiate] - there was no priesthood authority and no priesthood keys.  There was no prophet to direct the work.

No authority.  No understanding.  No organization = Apostasy.

So the Lord sent his messengers from his presence, with the fulness of the gospel, and with power, and the authority of the priesthood to bestow upon men, and gave them commandments … because the Lord knew the calamities which were to come upon the world, and it was his will that a proper warning, and the opportunity to receive the gospel be given unto men...

In order for a complete restoration to take place, we needed 3 things.  

1. The fulness of the gospel brought back.  We needed to have a knowledge of Jesus Christ, his atonement and resurrection, and we needed to know and understand how that applies to us individually.
2. We needed the priesthood power restored to the earth.
3. We also need authority and priesthood keys to perform saving ordinances.

We announce that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the kingdom of God on earth, the only place where men may come to learn the true doctrines of salvation and find the authority of the holy priesthood.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the kingdom of God on the earth!  This means that in this church we are taught not only what we need to know, but also what we need to do to gain eternal life and exaltation.

Section 2: The Lord Himself directs the work of the Church, and it is our privilege to have membership in it. 

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is in literal reality the kingdom of God on earth.

I desire to say that no man of himself can lead this church. It is the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ; he is at the head. The church bears his name, has his priesthood, administers his gospel, preaches his doctrine, and does his work.

If this were the work of man, it would fail, but it is the work of the Lord, and he does not fail...  It is the Lord’s work, and do not forget that it is the Almighty who is going to do this work, and not man. 

So many times I think we as church members need to remember this.   The service and work that we perform in our wards and stakes is not our work.  It is not up to us.  It is not for our glory.  

A few years ago, I was called as the Camp Director for our ward.  I had two camp assistants and one food assistant.  About six weeks before camp, one of my assistant's stopped returning my calls, quit fulfilling assignments I had given her, and then abruptly moved out of the ward.  About the same time, my other assistant was called to be the Young Women's president.  Two weeks before camp, a new camp assistant was called, but she told me up front that she would help out where she could, but she wasn't planning to attend camp.  

I struggled, a lot!  First, I didn't want to judge these sisters, but it was hard.  Second, I worried.  I worried that camp was going to be bad.  I worried that the girls were not going to have fun.  I worried that the girls wouldn't feel the spirit.  I worried that things wouldn't go perfectly.  I did the best I could, I prayed to my Heavenly Father, and went to work.

You know what I learned?  I learned that it wasn't up to me!  The girls had the experience that their Heavenly Father wanted them to have.  He loves them.  He knows what is best for them.  I just needed to do my part and leave the rest up to him.  If we are trying our best, striving to listen to the spirit, and working towards a worthy goal, Heavenly Father will do the rest.

...this church has a divinely appointed mission to perform under the direction and leadership of Jesus Christ, our Savior, and that nothing will stop his plans pertaining to it. It will fulfill the designs of our Father in heaven.

This church, under Christ's direction will fulfill its divinely appointed mission, which is to fulfill the designs of our Heavenly Father.  Reminds me of Moses 1:39.

Section 3: The Church is organized to help members find joy and happiness in this life and eternal life i n the life to come.

The Lord has established all things in order and has given us a perfect system. Men cannot improve upon it. If we would carry out that which the Lord has revealed, as he has revealed it, then all things would be perfect, for the organization is a perfect organization; the theory of it—the plan of it—is without flaw.

There is a big "if" in that paragraph.  "IF" we would carry out that which the Lord has revealed, the Church organization would run perfectly.  All too often we let ego, agenda, judgement, self-promotion, weaknesses, anger, the list goes on....  get in the way of us carrying out that which the Lord has revealed in a perfect way.

In every gospel dispensation there are special needs to be met, problems to be solved, and help that must be given to assist and aid the members of the Church in working out their salvation.. Hence we have auxiliary organizations [Relief Society, Young Men, Young Women, Primary, and Sunday School] to aid and assist the priesthood. They are so organized as to meet the needs of the people in whatever social conditions may exist. They are part of the government of God and are set up to help members of the Church perfect their lives and do those things which assure them of joy and happiness in this life and eternal life in the life to come. …

What social conditions exist where you are that are met by the auxiliary organizations of the Church?  What social conditions exist in our world today that are met and corrected by these auxiliary organizations?

The Church and its agencies constitute in effect a service organization to help the family and the individual. Home teachers, priesthood leaders, and bishops are appointed to lead those with whom they labor to eternal life in our Father’s kingdom, and the auxiliary organizations are appointed to aid and assist in this great work of salvation.

The priesthood leads and provide structure, the auxiliary organizations aid and assist.  This is the way the Lord has set up this perfect system.  What would happen if we were all trying to lead?  

We cannot stress too strongly the great need to utilize all of these programs for the benefit and blessing of all our Father’s children. …

If all of us do all of the things we should in carrying forward the programs of the Church, the Lord will bless and prosper us so fully that success shall attend our labors, and out of it all peace and joy will be our lot here and eternal glory hereafter

Now to section 4: Our service in the Church expresses love for others and appreciation for the Lord's infinite service.

Normally when we talk about service in Relief Society we are talking about individual service to individual members.  Not so with this section.  We are talking about individual service within the Church.

The man who does only those things in the Church which concern himself alone will never reach exaltation. For instance, the man who is willing to pray, to pay his tithes and offerings, and to attend to the ordinary duties which concern his own personal life, and nothing more, will never reach the goal of perfection.

Never refuse to serve. When a presiding officer asks your help, be glad to accept and give the best you have to that labor. The Lord expects this of us, and we are under covenant to do so. This course brings joy and peace, and at the same time those who serve receive the greatest blessing. The teacher gains more than the one taught; the blessing returned to us when we accept a call to work in the Church is far greater than the blessing we can impart to others. He who refuses to perform any labor or shirks responsibility when it is given him in the Church is in grave danger of losing the guidance of the Spirit. Eventually he becomes lukewarm and indifferent to all duties, and, like the plant that is not cultivated and watered, he shrivels up and dies a spiritual death.

Harsh, but true words!  But always remember this next piece of counsel:

Your able service does not go unnoticed by that God whom you serve and in whose work you are engaged.

And finally, section 5: In this dispensation, the kingdom of God and the work of the Lord will spread throughout the world.

The gospel itself has been the same in all dispensations; the plan of salvation is the same for all our Father’s children in every age. From time to time it has been lost by apostasy, but whenever the Lord has had a people on earth, they have been offered the same laws and truths of salvation that he has revealed to us.

But there is one great added thing we have received in this age that has never been had before. In this dispensation the Lord has decreed that the Church shall never again be led astray; this time the gospel is here to stay. This time the revealed truth is destined to prepare a people for the second coming of the Son of Man, and the Church will be established in all parts of the earth when the Lord comes to usher in the millennial era of peace and righteousness.

We don't have to worry about the Lord taking the church from the earth.  What we do have to worry about is our own personal apostasy.  In most cases, personal apostasy comes from one of two things: 

1. apathy towards our personal duty/testimony
2. criticizing/judgement of church leaders, members and/or doctrines

How do we protect ourselves from personal apostasy?

Closing with the testimony of President Joseph Fielding Smith:

I know and testify that the Lord’s purposes on earth shall prevail. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is here to stay. The Lord’s work shall triumph. No power on earth can prevent the spread of truth and the preaching of the gospel in every nation.

I leave my blessing with you and my assurance that God is with his people, and that the work in which we are engaged shall triumph and roll forth until the eternal purposes of the Lord are fulfilled.

Faith and Repentance

This past Monday night, we had our Family Home Evening lesson on Faith and Repentance.  I used lesson 5, Faith and Repentance, in the Joseph Fielding Smith manual for my information.

Start out by singing Faith, from the Children's songbook.

I asked the kids what the first two principles of the gospel were, with a hint that the answer was contained in the Articles of Faith.  Isaac came up with the answer pretty quickly - from Article of Faith #4 we learn:

We believe that the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance...

So, Faith and Repentance.  I told the kids we were going to talk about these two principles. 

I put up my first visual aid. Disregard the background.  Well, don't disregard it entirely; it is after all the Young Women's theme, but look past it for the purpose intended here. I needed something to put my visual aids on and this was the only thing big enough and nearby :)

Then I read this quote from Joseph Fielding Smith:

“Faith without works is dead” [James 2:26]—in other words, it does not exist. I think James’ meaning clearly is, “You show me your faith without your works, and nothing will result; but I will show you my faith with my works, and something will be accomplished.” [See James 2:18.] Faith means action. … Faith, therefore, is stronger than belief. …

We then discussed that in order to have true faith, we must act.  I read this quote to the kids and then explained what it meant in simpler terms:

 Faith cannot be obtained by inaction or through indifference or passive belief. The mere desire to obtain faith will not bring faith any more than the desire to be skilled in music or painting will bring proficiency in these things without intelligent action.

Then I put up my next visual aid.  Faith leads to action.

We talked about the difference between faith and belief and I encouraged the kids to give me examples of believing something and having faith in something.  I also asked them to share things that they cannot become good at unless they do or act upon.

I then explained that it is the same way in the church.  Quoting again from President Smith:

… If we want to have a living, abiding faith, we must be active in the performance of every duty as members of this Church. …

Living means that is it alive.  It grows and changes and becomes stronger.  Abiding means that it has staying power; it doesn't go away.  In order to have a living, abiding faith, we must actively participate in our duties in the church!

I then shared this quote:

Repentance is the second fundamental principle of the gospel and the outgrowth of faith.

Outgrowth means that it leads to something.  When we have faith and we are working and doing and acting with faith, it will naturally lead to repentance.

I then added to our visual.  

Look at how our faith led to action which grew into repentance!

I asked if the kids thought that repentance was a happy thing or a sad thing.  They said it was a sad thing.  I agreed that most of the time when we talk about repentance it is a sad thing or an embarrassing thing, but listen to what Joseph Fielding Smith says about repentance:

Repentance is one of the most comforting and glorious principles taught in the gospel. In this principle the mercy of our Heavenly Father and his Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, is made manifest perhaps more strongly than in any other principle. What a dreadful thing it would be if there were no forgiveness of sin and no means for the remission of sin for those who are humbly repentant!

Repentance is not a bad and sad thing!  It is a wonderful GIFT from God to show us his love.

I went on to read:

The scriptures say:

“Thou shalt offer a sacrifice unto the Lord thy God in righteousness, even that of a broken heart and a contrite spirit.” [D&C 59:8.]

That means repentance.

… Repentance, according to the definition given in the dictionary, is sincere sorrow for sin with self-condemnation, and complete turning from the sin. … There can be no true repentance without sorrow and the desire to be freed from sin.

I spent a little time explaining "broken heart" and "contrite spirit" to the kids.  President Smith explains it really well, but the connection can be easy to miss.  A broken heart means that you are not sorry that you got caught or embarrassment, but real self-condemning sorrow.

A contrite spirit means that you turn from the sin.  You don't want to do the wrong thing anymore.  You have a desire to be free from the sin forever.

Moving on, we read this quote and talked about procrastination.  (Again, I needed to explain what the word meant.)

Procrastination, as it may be applied to gospel principles, is the thief of eternal life, which is life in the presence of the Father and the Son.

At this point, my kids became concerned that they would be kept from eternal life because of sins they had committed, not repented for and then had forgotten about.  This was a perfect opportunity to teach them that is why daily prayer and self-evaluation is so important.  It is much easier to remember the things we do wrong and can try to be better at if we are looking back over one day's time instead of a week or two weeks.  

I briefly summarized a program outlined by Elder David A Bednar from a talk entitled, Pray Always, which I will copy at the bottom of this post for reference.

In closing, I challenged them, and myself, to be more diligent about daily personal prayers as a way of increasing our faith and also becoming better people trough repentance.

Elder David A Bednar: Pray Always

Consider this example. There may be things in our character, in our behavior, or concerning our spiritual growth about which we need to counsel with Heavenly Father in morning prayer. After expressing appropriate thanks for blessings received, we plead for understanding, direction, and help to do the things we cannot do in our own strength alone. For example, as we pray, we might:

• • 
  Reflect on those occasions when we have spoken harshly or inappropriately to those we love the most.

• • 
  Recognize that we know better than this, but we do not always act in accordance with what we know.

• • 
  Express remorse for our weaknesses and for not putting off the natural man more earnestly.

• • 
  Determine to pattern our life after the Savior more completely.

• • 
  Plead for greater strength to do and to become better.

Such a prayer is a key part of the spiritual preparation for our day.

During the course of the day, we keep a prayer in our heart for continued assistance and guidance—even as Alma suggested: “Let all thy thoughts be directed unto the Lord” (Alma 37:36).

We notice during this particular day that there are occasions where normally we would have a tendency to speak harshly, and we do not; or we might be inclined to anger, but we are not. We discern heavenly help and strength and humbly recognize answers to our prayer. Even in that moment of recognition, we offer a silent prayer of gratitude.

At the end of our day, we kneel again and report back to our Father. We review the events of the day and express heartfelt thanks for the blessings and the help we received. We repent and, with the assistance of the Spirit of the Lord, identify ways we can do and become better tomorrow. Thus our evening prayer builds upon and is a continuation of our morning prayer. And our evening prayer also is a preparation for meaningful morning prayer.

Morning and evening prayers—and all of the prayers in between—are not unrelated, discrete events; rather, they are linked together each day and across days, weeks, months, and even years. This is in part how we fulfill the scriptural admonition to “pray always” (Luke 21:36; 3 Nephi 18:15, 18;D&C 31:12). Such meaningful prayers are instrumental in obtaining the highest blessings God holds in store for His faithful children.

Three Things Thursday

1. A picture Jared drew from a Ratchet & Clank game cover.

2. Some pictures of a few of the kids playing a game prior to Family Home Evening.

3. I was reading the next chapter in the Joseph Fielding Smith manual, I came across this gem.  Something I really need to remember and put into practice... especially at home.

Strengthening and Preserving the Family

I haven't proof-read this yet, so if there are errors, they be the errors of this woman... lol!  And if you are in my ward, don't read this until after Sunday, ok?

Don't know if I have mentioned it yet in blogland, but at the beginning of the year I was called to teach Relief Society on the 3rd Sunday of each month.  This year, the lessons come from the book, Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Fielding Smith.  I teach the even numbered chapters and this month I will be leading the discussion on chapter 4: Strengthening and Preserving the Family.  These are a few of my thoughts on this chapter.

First, I want to say that this chapter has the possibility of creating stress and guilt in women, who already feel stressed and guilt-ridden, because they just can't do it all.  I'm convinced that the reception of the message and instruction in this chapter is going to depend a lot on each individual's state of mind and will also depend a great deal on the delivery of the message.  In my discussion of this chapter, I hope to provide encouragement to choose one area to work on, not try to live perfection starting tomorrow.  It's not about being perfect, and it's not necessarily about being better tomorrow than you were today.  Believe me there are many today's in my life that were worse than yesterday.  I really think it is about trying to be better over time.

Second, I worry that women who are not married may feel overlooked in this conversation.  I hope to apply these principles to everyone regardless of circumstance.  We all come from a family and we are all part of God's family.  The principles and doctrine are the same, although the application of the principles may differ due to circumstance.

Anyway, on to the chapter.

I'd like to begin with the 2nd section entitled, The Lord instituted the family to endure eternally.

Marriage, we have learned, is an eternal principle ordained before the foundation of the world and instituted on this earth before death came into it. Our first parents were commanded to multiply and replenish the earth. It naturally follows that the family organization was also intended to be eternal.

I've never thought about the order that marriage and death were instituted on this earth, so this passage was interesting to me.  When Adam and Eve were placed in the garden, we believe that they were married.  They were then commanded to have children.  All of this took place before they partook of the forbidden fruit, bringing death into the world.  Marriage and family were eternal at this point, because there was no death.

I also wondered about the use of the word, "ordained" in the first sentence.  "Marriage is an eternal principle ordained before the foundation of the world..."  You know me and words; I looked up the definition to have a clear understanding of what is being taught.  Ordain = confer holy orders on; put in order.  So in other words, Marriage is an eternal principle put in order before the foundation of the world.  Not only that, but it was given to serve a holy purpose.

In the plan prepared for this earth the laws governing in the celestial world became the foundation. The great work and glory of the Lord is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” [Moses 1:39.] The only way this can be done is through marriage and the family, in fact this is the eternal order among the exalted and has been worlds without end.

When creating our world and deciding how His spirit children would come into this world and grow, our Heavenly Father didn't come up with a "new" model.  He didn't need to "reinvent the wheel" so to speak.   He used the same organization that existed in the premortal world.  It wasn't a new and foreign principle for us, we were all familiar and comfortable with marriage and family.  We had seen it lived by our Heavenly Parents.

The chapter then goes on to discuss that the family unit is the foundation of society and that without that base, "... all the citizens are comparatively strangers to each other and where natural affection is not found; where no family ties bind the groups together, is one of horror. Such a condition could lead to but one end—anarchy and dissolution."  

The temple sealing provides the opportunity for a husband and wife to be sealed for this life and also for all eternity.  Children who are born to them "will be the children of that father and mother not only in mortal life but in all eternity, and they become members of the family of God in heaven and on earth...

… Those children... have a right to the companionship of father and mother, and father and mother are under obligations before their Eternal Father to be true to each other and raise those children in light and truth, that they may in the eternities to come, be one—a family within the great family of God.

We should remember, as Latter-day Saints, that outside of the celestial kingdom, there is no family organization [after death]. That organization is reserved for those who are willing to abide in every covenant and every obligation which we are called upon to receive while we sojourn here in this mortal life.

The blessing of honoring our covenants and being obedient to God's commandments is an eternal family. When we understand this promise and keep it in mind, it will affect our dealings with those we should hold most dear to us.

The hope of eternal life, including the reuniting of the members of the family when the resurrection comes, brings to the heart greater love and affection for each member of the family. With this hope, husbands are inclined to love their wives with a stronger and more holy love; and wives in like manner love their husbands. The tender feeling and solicitude on the part of parents for their children is increased, for the children become endeared to them with bands of love and happiness which cannot be broken.

Now that we have a basis for the foundation of the family, let's jump back to the first section of the chapter. The first line of the chapter, is this:

"The family is the most important organization in time or in eternity."

There isn't anything that is more important than family.  NOTHING!  And Satan knows this too.

Family unity and family commitment to the gospel are so important that the adversary has turned much of his attention to the destruction of families in our society. On every side there is an attack on the basic integrity of the family as the foundation of what is good and noble in life. 

As the forces of evil attack the individual by tearing away at his family roots, it becomes critical for Latter-day Saint parents to maintain and strengthen the family. There may possibly be a few very strong individuals who can survive without the support of a family, but more of us need the love, teaching, and acceptance that come from those who care very deeply.

The thing that stuck out the most to me in these paragraphs is that even if we are not keenly aware of how important our families are, Satan is.  This is from an address given in 1971.  It's not hard to imagine that Satan had launched his attack on the family back then when I see the state of the world today.  Slowly, society at large has had it's family roots destroyed and ripped away.

But, in the same paragraph we are told how we can combat this attack.  "It becomes critical for Latter-day Saint parents to maintain and strengthen the family." 

We then learn some truths about families:

There are certain old truths which will be truths as long as the world endures, and which no amount of progress can change. One of these is that the family (the organization consisting of father, mother, and children) is the foundation of all things in the Church; another, that sins against pure and healthy family life are those which, of all others, are sure in the end to be visited most heavily upon the nations in which they take place. …

We learn 2 important family truths from this paragraph:

1. The family is the foundation of all things in the Church.
2. Sins against pure and healthy family life will sooner or later be visited most heavily in the nations in which they are found.

If #2 sounds familiar, the same warning was given in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, in the 2nd to last paragraph.

WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

Continuing on...

There is no substitute for a righteous home. That may not be so considered in the world, but it is and ought to be in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The family is the unit in the kingdom of God.

The family is the most important organization in time or in eternity. … It is the will of the Lord to strengthen and preserve the family unit. We plead with fathers to take their rightful place as the head of the house. We ask mothers to sustain and support their husbands and to be lights to their children.

The gospel is family centered; it must be lived in the family. It is here we receive our greatest and most important training as we seek to create for ourselves eternal family units patterned after the family of God our Father.

So many great things to discuss in these paragraphs!  So let's start.

It is the will of the Lord to strengthen and preserve the family unit. 
Again, I wanted to be clear on meaning, so I look up a couple of words.

• strengthen = make or become stronger, build up; fortify, strengthen with defensive works as to protect against attack
• preserve = maintain in original state; keep safe from harm or injury; to treat to prevent decomposition or deterioration.

Wow!  These words are fighting words.  We are in a fight and the stakes are high!  It is clear to me, that we are meant to ACTIVELY strengthen and preserve our families.  We cannot be passive.  

When I think of "strengthen", I am reminded of lifting weights.  Strength doesn't come at once; it is earned.  It takes day after day of lifting and working, putting forth effort and time.  

photo credit

When I think of the word "preserve",  I think about bottling food for storage.  We have to do specific things to the food to keep it safe to eat.  This takes knowledge, time, effort and desire.

photo credit

There is no substitute for a righteous home.  
Not a great Young Women's class, Young Men's Priesthood Quorum, Relief Society President, a devoted Bishop, or loving and focused leaders can match the power of a righteous home.

Latter-day Saint parents need to step up!  They must be the ones to maintain and strengthen their families.  It is their job, not a job for the church.  Parents must strengthen their family, not bishops. Fathers and Mothers, not YM and YW leaders.  PARENTS!

This reminds me of a favorite quote from Quentin L Cook:

Parents, the days are long past when regular, active participation in Church meetings and programs, though essential, can fulfill your sacred responsibility to teach your children to live moral, righteous lives and walk uprightly before the Lord. ...It is essential that this be faithfully accomplished in homes which are places of refuge where kindness, forgiveness, truth, and righteousness prevail. Parents must have the courage to filter or monitor Internet access, television, movies, and music. Parents must have the courage to say no, defend truth, and bear powerful testimony. Your children need to know that you have faith in the Savior, love your Heavenly Father, and sustain the leaders of the Church. Spiritual maturity must flourish in our homes. My hope is that no one will leave this conference without understanding that the moral issues of our day must be addressed in the family. Bishops and priesthood and auxiliary leaders need to support families and make sure that spiritual principles are taught. Home and visiting teachers can assist, especially with children of single parents.

When I was young, it seemed that attending church every Sunday was a good enough indication of whether a person would grow up and still be an active member of the church.  Sure family home evening and family scripture study were strongly encouraged, but the overall attitude seemed to be that just getting yourself and your kids to church was "good enough".  This is not the case any longer!  Satan's influence has grown too strong and too brazen for fence-sitters to be safe.  

It must be lived in the family

We must live the gospel in our home with our families, not just on Sunday at church.  Father's must lead their homes and mothers must support their husband in these efforts and "be lights to their children".  When I think of a light, I think of guidance, comfort, and truth.  That is our job as women.  No matter whether the child is ours or not, our role is guide them and comfort them and lead them to truth.

Now before everyone gets all weighed down and feels overburdened, here is the answer of how to accomplish the strengthening and preserving of our family.  On to section 3, We strengthen and preserve our families as we spend time together, love each other, and live the gospel together.

The primary function of a Latter-day Saint home is to insure that every member of the family works to create the climate and conditions in which all can grow toward perfection. For parents, this requires a dedication of time and energy far beyond the mere providing of their children’s physical needs. For children, this means controlling the natural tendency toward selfishness.

We need to work together to provide an atmosphere in our homes where the gospel can be taught and lived, That doesn't mean that it will be a peaceful, chaos free place at all times. I'm sorry, but that is perfection and clearly, President Smith stated that we were working towards perfection.  He didn't say we would attain it.

But it does mean we need to work.  Parents must put in dedication, time and energy.  And children aren't getting off scott free here, they must work to overcome selfishness.  We all must work together to create the environment where gospel learning and growth can take place.

The home … is the workshop where human characters are built and the manner in which they are formed depends upon the relationship existing between parents and the children. The home cannot be what it should be unless these relationships are of the proper character. Whether they are so or not depends, it is true, upon both parents and children, but much more upon parents. They must do their best.

I think the important thing to remember is that we are all in different situations with different outside pressures and limitations.  It is impossible to blanket statement what everyone should be doing.  Everyone's best will be different.  Our best can also change based on what we have on our plates at a given time.

There are a number of great questions posed in the chapter that would be excellent for self reflection.

• Do you spend as much time making your family and home successful as you do in pursuing social and professional success? 
• Are you devoting your best creative energy to the most important unit in society—the family? 
• Is your relationship with your family merely a routine, unrewarding part of life? 

And to wrap up, here are the suggestions that President Joseph Fielding Smith gives us for bettering our relationships with our children.

If I had to suggest one thing which I think we as parents are most lacking, it would be a sympathetic understanding of our children. Live with the children; follow their paths. … Know everything that claims the interest of the children, be a good sport with them.

We have been trying to impress upon parents the need of paying more attention to their children, having a little more of the spirit of the gospel in their homes, a little more unity and a little more faith; a little more responsibility religiously, spiritually on the part of the fathers; also, of the mothers; more of the teaching of the gospel in the home.